I just read an article about women being addicted to porn – a large part of which includes the online world. The problem with the article – and the reason I’m not linking to it – is because they used an example of a very unfortunate woman who had been sexually abused when she was a child and raised in a household filled with adult material – magazines, movies, etc. To use this as an example of women becoming addicted to “porn” is like comparing apples and oranges. This woman clearly had deep emotional scars that needed attention. The use of adult material or porn was an understandable consequence of her up bringing – or lack of it.

But, I do think there are things on the Net that can become addicted – something like Second Life. I’ve looked at it but I just know that I would become so immersed in it – especially since they have an Adult Section – that it would take up hours and hours of my day. I’ve been involved in online chatting for years and know how I could spend a majority of my time in chat rooms on IRC. For awhile I was even in charge of the biggest Adult online chat system and that really took up every moment of my time.

This weekend I watched a special on MTV about women who are involved in the online world – one of them a singer who performed several times a week on Second Life – but was scared to sing in front of others. Having experienced panic attacks and agoraphobia as she said she had I can completely understand how she could be in this position. She had the security of her Avatar, who actually looked very much like her, and the safety of only looking at other Avatars of people who really wanted to be there to see her. She spent a great deal of time online – but through her own courage and the help of another online singer she finally got up the nerve to go to a club where they had open mic nights and performed. The first night wasn’t exactly a smashing success, but she didn’t give up and gave it one more try. The ending credits said that she was now planning an East Coast tour and still performed weekly on Secong Life.

For some people the Net can become obsessive – be it porn, games, research, chat, or whatever. But does that mean it’s addicted. There are plenty of sites on the net that have little quizes for you to test to see if something in your life has you addicted. Most of these will tell you that if the activity interfers with your daily life to the extent that other important things are being pushed aside – like interacting with family, friends, your job – then you’re showing at the least warning signs of being addicted.

What I objected to about the original article I was referring to was that they gave no specifics. I know of no one in the Adult for Women online groups who were ever asked about this. And how would they go about finding out these facts anyway? Have any of you been asked about your surfing habits?

The best advice is to get some advice if whatever you’re going is interfering with your life and the to enjoy just about anything in moderation. Sadly, that doesn’t include chocolate cake for me. lol

Sandra